Last Post

Today is the fifth anniversary of the death of my beloved dog Pony. Fitting enough time to say goodbye to blogging. Since this is the first post in three years, this shouldn't be a surprise.

Since Pony died:

* my Dad died six months later

* Hugo died at age 11 at what was thought to be a particularly aggressive form of cancer

* the rest of the goldfish died, the oldest being at least 13

* my Mom has had countless strokes, needed to go in a nursing home for 7 months ... which cost about all of her life savings

* she came back home, bedridden, and I care for her and my two pit bull mixes 

 * tried to commit suicide after Hugo died and Mom went into the home, failed, so I adopted a pit bull mix that was to be euthanized that day

* eleven months later, adopted another pit bull mix that was to be euthanized that day

* had to quit writing

* was appalled at Peter Gabriel's pathetic excuse of an album <i>I/O</i>

* am now mostly listening to Tom Waits, David Bowie, John Prine, and Leonard Cohen.

I'm 54, just waiting to die, but keeping myself distracted from the pain. I know that someone from the Peter Gabriel fan community has tried to contact me. I'd rather be left alone with my dogs, my books, and my Breyer model horses. I stopped all social media except YouTube and Goodreads. 

Goodbye, Blogger.

I'm Writing Again

Just a quick note for any prospective clients out there that I am writing web content again. Still depressed, but writing again.

Whee.

My 15th Anniversary of Returning to America

15 years ago today, my 13 month old dog Pony and I made two long train trips, a taxi ride and a trans-Atlantic flight from the UK to the country of my birth, USA. My Mom and Dad, divorced but together that day, picked us up. Pony and I had been homeless together and Mom consented to take us in after someone burned our bender down. A bender is a makeshift living space made from bending young tree trunks to make a frame where you can toss blankets and tarps over. We had been living in a two-person tent for over a month.

15 years later and there's only Mom and me left. I also have a one-year old goldfish and one other dog, Hugo (now 10) and that's it. I've lost my job, my Mom lost her ability to walk and I've lost any reason to write anymore. This photo was from around 15 years ago, clipped from The Bath Chronicle, which is why it's a bit wrinkly.

It's Been One Year Since My Dog Pony Died and I Don't Know What To Do

 Pony was the dog of a lifetime. When she died I cried out, "How will I live the rest of my life without her?" After all we'd been through for 15 years -- being beat up by the same guy, fire, flood, homelessness, international travel -- and even though I have my 10 year old dog Hugo, I am alone. This photo was taken when Pony was young and healthy.

My Dad Died and I Don't Know What to Do

Things have never been so bad with me. I stopped writing because I am so overwhelmed by panic and sorrow. As the title suggests, my Dad died of a suspected heart attack on March 30. He was found by a concerned neighbor. He lived alone in the Poconos. I tried calling him that Sunday (I usually call him on Sundays) and he didn't pick up. No big deal. He's done that before. I called back on Monday the 30th at 7:30 pm and still he didn't pick up. At 8:30 I got a call back -- from the county coroner.

And it's been all downhill ever since. I live 150 miles from his place. He had about 12 cats. two friends from him from church are taking care of the cats but they will not move them out of the trailer. I have no idea what's going to happen to the cats and I am so far away I cannot do anything about it.

My only sibling, my brother Matt, lives in Canada. He wants the trailer, Dad's life insurance, the SUV and the bank account. We've already paid a month's sewage bill on the place, where nobdy lives but the cats and two helpers who check in on them daily. I have no idea what will happen if the electricity bills aren't paid. I'm told the pipes in the mobile home will explode for some reason.

According to relatives, Dad did not leave a will. Which means everything has to go through probate, which means someone has to go to the courthouse in the county where Dad died.

Why can't I do it? First off, I'm not a good driver. Putting me behind the wheel of my SUV on the highways and traveling lost in the Poconos is not in the public's best interest.

But mainly I can't do anything because of my Mom. She's severely crippled, canot walk (cannot even lurch into a wheelchair) and going downhill. She doesn;t have the coronavirus, but does have many health problems like Diabetes Type II and spinal stenosis. I just lost my Dad (and seven months ago, my beloved dog Pony) and now I'm worried I'm going to lose my Mom.

So there's Dad's things and family obligation to do soething about them on one hand and on the other hand I have to take care of Mom. Taking care of Mom is my priority. I have to let all that stuff go (even the photos, even Dad's handicrafts, even a painting by my Uncle Jack) and stick to taking care of Mom in this time of CORVID-19.

Life has suddenly become a very fragile and terrifying thing.

How I Got Back to Writing Again

It's Thanksgiving here and I finally have the time and (more importantly) the energy to post on this sadly neglected blog. As the title suggests, I've been writing again here and there as my time, my health and my Mom's lack of health permit.

So, how did I manage it? Simple. I spent all my money. I drained my bank account and had some fun doing it, too. I spent most of it on books and Breyer model horses. I used to be a major collector of model horses when I was a kid (and I was a kid until I was 30.) I know Breyers are the gateway drug to hard drug equivelent of model horses like Peter Stones, resins and (gasp) porcelains, but I have been able to keep it at just Breyers.

I had hoped to add a photo of my collection but I cannot get the damn digital camera or the smartphone with the camera to work. I know there is a camera on this laptop but i cannot get a decent picture with it.

I did, however, manage a photo of me with Hugo, my sole remaining dog.

Pony Died Today

Pony went downhill suddenly and died quietly at home in the living room surrounded by her human family and my other (now only) dog Hugo.

Pony was born on 13 August 2004 in a council flat in Trowbridge, England. I was given her when she was 7 weeks old. We were both beat up by the same guy. He burned my home down just before Pony's first birthday. We fled together for my Mom's home in Clifton Heights, PA, where she spent the rest of her life. She was 15.

I know I'm supposed to write a proper eulogy but I can't. I have no idea how I'm going to face the rest of my life without her.

It's Pony's 15th Birthday!

Amazingly, Pony has made it to her 15th birthday. I say amazingly because one week after her 14th birthday, she began having seizures. Now she's on medication and the seizures seem to be under control for now. Pony has sure slowed down since her puppyhood (it's really weird not to have her pulling while walking anymore) but so have I.

Unfortunately, I don't have a recent photo of her to post here since I still haven't been able to figure out the damn digital camera I bought Mom about 11 years ago. I tried to give the camera away but Mom won't let me. That's my excuse, anyway. This photo was taken about 2010 or 2011 when Pony could still jump up on the couch and Hugo was young.

Since things have been very bad here, especially with my Mom's health, I probably will not be updating this blog more than once a year any more.

Winning Money Online? Whu --???

A long time ago, there was a website called Rewarder. I was one of the many hundreds of contributors. On the site, you asked a question and gave a couple of bucks to the best answer. (You can see why the site was short-lived.) You might enjoy one of the weirder questions I was asked:

"How Can I Win Money? I Mean Cash Online From My House"

My answer:

You can't. It's as simple as that. After all of my years of working from home as a freelance writer, I can assure you that winning cash from an online source is not a practical solution. If you want money, you have to work for it, even if the work you do is online. It's still work.

You can certainly make money online but there is no such thing as a sure thing when it comes to working online. You never know when clients will suddenly stiff you a payment or whether any work in your field is available.

Some people make money by taking online surveys, but you need to be careful with surveys. You should never have to pay to join a survey panel. Surveys can take a long time to fill out and only return pennies. Consider if you can afford to work for pennies an hour. There are also scam survey companies out there that never reimburse you no matter how many surveys you fill out.

Finding a legitimate online contest is difficult at best. If you've never heard of the website or company offering the contest, skip it. It could be a scam.

If you do enter an online contest, make sure that you can accept the prize. Are payments in checks, Pay Pal deposits or gift cards? If the prize is a Pay Pal deposit, then you need a Pay Pal account. Cash is not a usual prize.

Some products or services have Facebook pages or other social media pages that offer contests. Usually these are for products or small prizes like a box of tea and not cash.

Never open an email with an attachment from someone you do not know or have never contacted. Not all contests are legitimate. Some may be merely fishing for suckers in order to get hold of your personal data for identity theft.

I Give Up Writing

This song captures how useless it is for me to continue to write. I pour my heart out and either I'm ignored or rejected. I'm 48, a wash-up and tired. So how appropriate that I found my feelings best expressed by someone else (The Magnetic Fields, From a Sinking Boat) than myself, since I apparently suck as a writer.

I'm 48 Today. What the Hell Happened?

It's my 48th birthday. My Mom gave me a wind-up wristwatch. It rained on and off most of the day. I meant to write for part of today, but this is all I could manage because I am in a cake coma. My birthday cake is a box of butterscotch Krimpets. Okay -- two boxes.Well, back to binge-watching The Twilight Zone.

My Stepmother Died

I just got off the phone with my Dad. My Stepmother Dee died of cancer yesterday about 6 pm. He lives hours away from me in the Poconos. Now he's alone with 15 cats in the woods. I'm stuck with my crippled mother here in Clifton Heights and two dogs and everything SUCKS.

I will not be online for a while.

Happy 13th Birthday to My Dog Pony!

I first saw her when she was seven weeks old with her mom and litter mates in a small flat in England. She's now a teenager. We were both beaten up by the same man. Seeing her hit gave me the courage to leave that loser forever. We both were homeless together. We both saw our shelter home burnt down. We both survived the cross-Atlantic plane ride to America -- a new country for her but the land of my birth.

She's slowed down a bit and has far more white on her face than in this photo from ages past, but still as wonderful as ever. She's learned to share me with Hugo, a powderpuff Chinese Crested. She loves everybody -- except the vet. She's Pony, my dog and the best thing that ever happened to me.

Happy birthday, Pony. And hopefully there will be many more to come.

Too Tired To Blog -- I Blame My Mom

I know I haven't blogged on any of my numerous blogs Since Feb or March -- because I'm exhausted. That's a wimpy excuse, I know, but let's be honest -- I'm lucky to make $10 a year from all my blogs combined. It's not much of an incentive to continue. I worked my ass off in school, college and previous jobs so I deserve some time to relax.

Back to reading and watching Amazon Prime -- yeah, right. I spend most of my time taking care of my crippled mother. It's like taking care of a child -- a really smart child, but still. At any hour of the day or night there can be some kind of crisis -- a medication that needs renewing, a doctor who won't call back, a new food she suddenly becomes allergic to, spills, splats and anxiety attacks. She doesn't want me to be more than two hours away from home at any one time, so no more vacations to Germany and no more concerts.

And I take care of the dogs and the goldfish, too.

Let's put it this way -- a good day for me is when I only have to wipe my Mom's ass ONCE.

So yeah -- I'm EXHAUSTED.

The 50 Funniest American Writers: According to Andy Borowitz by Andy Borowitz

Not funny except for a few selections near the end (Wanda Sykes, George Carlin, Lenny Bruce, Jean Shepherd, Woody Allen.)

(In other words -- not recommended.)

NOTE: This review (such as it is) originally appeared on Goodreads. I spend way too much time on Goodreads. Anyone else addicted to writing reviews on Goodreads?

Anyone?

Book Series Review The Everything Series By Adams Media

No, I haven’t read them all but enough to get the general flavor of the series

First there was the For Dummies series by Wiley Publishing and then came The Complete Idiot's Guide series by the Penguin Group. Since they did so well, there has been a host of other series based on the similar themes, subjects and layouts as both the For Dummies series and The Complete Idiot's Guide series. The most promising of these knock-off series has been the Everything book series from Adams Media.

The Good

The Everything series tends to be indexed very well, organized well and include an interesting "Additional Resources" section of print media, websites or organizations to help you get further details. These are especially helpful for students, teachers or freelance writers.

The books use an easy to read font and use different colored text and headings to help break up long chapters into easy-to-digest pieces. Like the two series it mimics, the Everything books also has specially named and illustrated features scattered about the text. These include "E Alerts" which are warnings; "E Essentials" which are "quick, handy tips" and "E Facts" which sometimes wanders into the trivial.

The Bad

Unfortunately, the Everything book series does not have the clout (such that it is) that the For Dummies or The Complete Idiot's Guide has. Perhaps this will change in the future. But for now, the Everything series cannot pull in experts in the field that also know how to write. The writing quality varies considerably from book to book.

Also, these books are less than 300 pages long. That does not include the introduction, contents list, index, Additional Resources section and advertisements for other books in the series. Many books in the series try to cover topics much too broad to be explained in less than 300 pages. The most successful books in the series are ones that focus on a more specific topic, such as The Everything Blogging Book by Aliza Rishdahl.

The Downright Ugly

The titles of some books in the Everything series can be deceptive. The writer may cover a topic slightly different than what the title suggests. This can be highly annoying. One example of such a book is The Everything Aquarium Book by Frank Indiviglio. He spends most of the book talking about saltwater or marine aquariums. This does not help people with freshwater or brackish water aquariums.

This was also reflected in the eight pages of color photographs in the book. Seven pages described salt water species. Color pages also push up the cost of a book and so it would have been much better for the reader to ditch the photos and get eight more pages of content, especially about freshwater aquariums and equipment.

Happy Birthday Peter Gabriel

Today is Peter Gabriel's 67th birthday, so I'm trotting out this old picture that appeared originally on the Solsbury Hill website. I couldn't find any news on PG except that his rather mediocre song "The Veil" (from the Oliver Stone movie Snowden) is up for an Oscar (the show is on Feb. 26.) The same song was nominated but lost at last night's Grammys. Something called "Heathens" won and apparently the population of a small nation sung on the track.

The only other news I could find is that Anna Gabriel, PG's eldest child, is selling her posh New York flat.

If you're waiting for a new album from PG, don't hold your breath.

Is Blogging Stressful?

Several years ago, one of the most widely circulated stories among bloggers is The New York Times’ In Wide Word of 24/7 Stress, Writers Blog ‘Til They Drop.   Chances are, you already read it, had it emailed to you or heard about it.  The story alleges that bloggers can kill themselves blogging in the hunt to report the Next Big Thing.

The Next Big Thing is crucial to bloggers trying to make some money.  The Next Big Thing often brings in more traffic and thus gives the blog a larger chunk of revenue share.

The Reality of Blogging

I hate to disappoint you, but blogging is not stressful in and of itself.  In fact, I find it to be a real relief from my daily stress.  I have two personal blogs that don’t generate money and have worked on blogs for clients that did make money.  The only stress I received was blogging for other clients. (“Hmm – wonder if he’ll bother paying me this month?”)

There does seem to be a difference between the blogger interviewed for the New York Times article than for "normal" bloggers.  The former — and most stressed out kind — are journalists where the deadline was always yesterday.  Don’t let their job pressures dissuade you from writing a diary, journal or blog.  Getting your thoughts out of your head and onto paper (or a computer screen) is one of the most economic and effective ways of managing stress.

The Word “Blog”

Just the word "blog" is can make you relax.  It’s such a ludicrous-sounding word.  I know blog is short for "weblog", but that’s not what I thought of when I first heard the word ‘blog" years ago.  I thought it was a sound you made when a vine or a tentacle wrapped around you.  You know — "Have I ever seem a giant squid around here?  Nah, there aren’t any giant sq — blog!" 

So, just thinking "I’ve got to go work on the blogs now" can put at least half a smile on my face.

Help In Survival Situations

I used to have a book on wilderness survival written by an ex-SAS guy, John Wiseman.  In it, you learn things like how to survive in the woods after your airplane has gone down or how to find drinkable water in the Arctic.  And you know what one thing he recommended for surviving difficult situations where you are stranded in the middle of nowhere?  

If you guess, "keep a journal", pat yourself on the book and go have a cookie.   If you kept a journal (ordinary or written blog") in survival situations, you can keep track of what plants are edible, any significant landmarks to remember and how long you’ve been stuck out in the middle of nowhere.  He also says that it helps as a stress reliever and to give you a sense of purpose ("I can’t die yet — needs I must blog!")

So, if you don’t believe me, you can take it from John Wiseman.  The act of blogging is not stressful and it can help you overcome stressful situations.  Blogging for money can be stressful, depending on how goofy your client is.  But even then, you don’t have to deal with the client face to face.  But you can always blog about how annoying blogging is, as long as you don’t name any clients and incur a lawsuit.

The Informal Library in Clifton Heights, Pennsylvania

My favorite place to go in my neighborhood

My home town of Clifton Heights has a rather unusual library.  It’s so unusual that most residents are completely unaware that it exists.  When asked where the closest library is, A Clifton Heights resident will most likely direct you to the public libraries in Lansdowne or Upper Darby.  But one library exists, unheralded and mostly ignored inside of the Clifton Heights Borough Hall.

The Informal Library

This library lacks many of the things a usual library has.  It does not have librarians, books organized into categories or even steady hours.  But it also does have due dates.  The library is based entirely on the honor system.  Residents can take as many books as they want, although they are requested to bring other books they do not want in compensation.

The library is the first room on the left as soon as you walk into the Borough Hall doors.  Often the lights are out.  Just open the door and switch on the lights.  Inside the vast room, you’ll see a lot of empty tables and chairs.  This is where Veteran’s Administration meetings, council meetings and voting takes place. 

But flanking the room are large, stately wooden bookshelves crammed with books, old textbooks and tons of Reader’s Digest Condensed Book tombs.  You never know what you are going to find at the informal library.  I try to only go a few times a year in order to ensure the largest turnover possible.  I like to savor the occasion as it’s such a treat.

Tips

The library is mostly open when the Borough Hall is open.  However, if there is a meeting going on, then the doors will be locked.  You are allowed to look for books while voting is going on, as long as you do not bother the volunteers helping out that day.  They usually park their desks in front of one wall of bookcases.

Bring a large tote bag or backpack and fill it up.  Don’t expect to see a lot of books or authors that you recognize.  But this is a great chance to expand your reading horizons and sample all kinds of authors and genres for free.  Bring a sense of humor.  Some volunteers do try and sort out the shelves, but mostly they are a hodge-podge of categories. 

Clifton Heights Borough Hall

30 South Springfield Road

Clifton Heights, PA 19018

610-623-1000

Why You Need to Market Yourself Online If You Are Self-Employed

Originally published on Helium

Online marketing is crucial in order to be both self-employed and able to pay bills. No one will come looking for a freelancer. The self-employed freelancer needs to go to the clients. There are several ways a freelancer can connect with future clients.

Social Networking

There are two types of social networking sites available to the self-employed. There are all-subject social websites like Twitter, Facebook and MySpace and then there are business-related social networks like LinkedIn and Facebook’s BranchOut. Only join free websites. Fill out the profile page as completely as possible. Use a professional head-shot or at least a clear photo as an avatar.

Although business social networks may seem to be the most logical choice to concentrate efforts, they are a narrow avenue for connecting with new clients. BranchOut, for example, has a very limited search feature for their job listings.  Connecting with other self-employed contemporaries on regular Facebook or Facebook groups opens up new client possibilities. Building relationships with others not only helps relieve the loneliness the self-employed experience, but also can give tips and tricks on what new markets are opening and if anyone is hiring.

Bidding Websites

There are many job-listing sites that serve as a third party between clients and contractors. For example, if an e-business needs a new logo, they put up a job listing and sift through the individual job bids and proposals in order to pick who they will work with. The bidding websites often provide help mediating any disputes between clients and contractors.

Some of these sites include Elance, Odesk or iFreelance. Get to learn which bidding sites feature which type of jobs. Unfortunately, many of these sites require a subscription fee. It is not necessary to subscribe to a job listing site. Take whatever free membership is offered and take advantage of any free trial memberships. Two to four weeks’ free membership is enough time to find a client.

Maintain Business Website

The self-employed ideally should purchase their own domain name in order to really make their online presence felt. Buying a domain name and building an easy-to-read and easy to navigate business website makes an incredible first impression on clients.

But not every self-employed worker can buy his or her own domain name. Freelance web content writers, for example, will struggle to afford a domain name. But even maintaining a free blog on Blogger can help create a positive impression on anyone who clicks onto the blog. Keep updating it at least once a week to reassure clients both old and new that no one has suddenly disappeared. Keep all views on religion or politics off this blog (unless you are me.)